Here I am again, taking a stroll down irrelevancy street….
You know the street right? Its the next block down from the corner of UR OLD & UR S2PiiiD! I extremely recently ran into that age old situation where you’ve been handed the ability to “I Told You So” someone. It always feels so good to be right, right?! But there are times when its the last thing you ever wanted to do….
Before we barrel headlong off that cliff though, lets rewind just a titch…
We have all had that I told you so moment, whether you were the recipient or the giver of said “I told you so”. When we were young, they were fun right?
I got to give one to one of my friends when we were young, in the perfect setting for maximum “I told you so” triumph! Walmart! He hollered at me, “You think I can frog jump that big yellow pole over there?”. To which I promptly answered, “Absolutely not, and its a super bad idea, but I beg of you, please…. DO IT!”. He took that, and began running, leaped hands out, and as if in slow motion, put his hands on top of that barrier pole, pushed with everything he had, and at that point, I like to believe his whole short life flashed before his eyes, as he was flying about 3 inches too low. There was no stopping it now, the point of impact was imminent, the vision of having children one day slowly floating into the distance, those raspberries under that twig became blackberries in the blink of an eye, immediately transferring to a full inversion and head first digger into the concrete directly in front of the busy doorway to “The Walmart”. With all the folks walking in and out getting a good chuckle at the display that unfolded in front of them, none of which were better than the door greeter, that was, no joke, belly laughing while asking if he was okay! All the while I was almost in the roadway, on the ground laughing so hard there is a 73% chance I peed just a little… (its okay though, everyone was looking at him, I got away with it). By far my greatest “I told you so” triumph!
You know when you are getting old when the I told you so moments begin to become depressing. With age, things seem to change from silly, comical situations, to life changing situations, and you begin to loose that youthful whimsy that used to be such a focal point of joy for many of us. That point when you realize that it must have really sucked to be the parents raising me, I was an @$$hole!
This current situation I find myself confronted with is one that is not unlike what many others have had to watch unfold in front of their eyes as well. This is a situation that has been brewing for years… With that age and that hindsight thingamabob (google it, its old man speak… true story)I alerted to the little ticky tak things that are small, which could birth larger issues, and when unchecked, issues that could cause an irreversible situation that will last a lifetime. You’re thinking the entire time, its okay, I can fix this, if you just listen to me, I can help you not make the mistakes of your past and complete the cycle, as it were…
At what point do you realize that your voice has become the same as Charlie Brown’s mother (another old manism, google it…). The same words delivered through a more modern vessel, you know, like Justin Bieber! Just kidding, I’m not that old… But, say, Taylor Swift… If Taylor Swift were to deliver the same words, it would change the course of society and conventional thought. But, since it is coming out of a face that has a few extra wrinkles, it is disregarded as old, out of touch, so on and so on… You see this and evaluate your frustration, look back to when you knew better than your parents who were ancient and out of touch, and began to follow the “words of wisdom” from whatever pop icon of the day had. We shed our childish bonds and adorn the “out of touch” cloak, as seen by the youth of the generation you came to this realization and beyond.
Sadly this is where my “I told you so” moment comes into play. Its the worst “I told you so” I’ve ever had the ability to give to date, and would give anything I have to not be able to say it. I wanted to be so wrong so bad I can taste it. The details are irrelevant, but there are so many moments in time, so many chances, so many situations, so many options given, so many options dismissed, discarded, defeated. Its depressing beyond belief… Knowing you could have made a difference if given the chance in a timely fashion. But, alas, those in control would not relinquish the control until the “failsafe” (more like fail guaranteed) mechanism had already been activated, the path ahead had no more forks and the road that lies ahead is the road to perdition…
The point to where you have to decide to give up, is usually substantially later than you really should have given up, but it doesn’t stop the pain and ache for what could and should have been. In the scheme of things, its just one life, lost to the statistics right? But, it is different if you know that life, you’ve tried so hard with that life, and find that life was just out of your reach the whole time. Little lights of hope here and there, only to be blotted out as quickly as they shone.
It makes me grab my kids, hold them maybe a little bit tighter, bathe in their innocence, and at the same time weep for their future. But kiddos, ol’ dad will promise you this, there will never be an issue you cant bring to me, no situation I wont help you through, no stone I wont move heaven and earth to break barring the way to that fork that could be the final chance to turn off of that road to perdition…. There will come a time when you are angry at me, you hate me, you think I am ruining your life, and a whole host of other unpleasant things. But, I need you to know that I will love you at all times, but I cant be your friend at all times. All I do, all I think, all I say, all of it, is to keep the path to be better than me as open as humanly possible.
And, kiddos, if I can give you one piece of advice, just this one little morsel, at your tender young age, just trying navigate through youth, please heed this.
If given the chance, and you are with your friends, and you are walking up to the front door of “The Walmart”, please dont be the friend that receives the “I told you so”, be the giver! Because its awesome!!! And there is a 97% chance the fella who received my “I told you so”, is the recipient of a state mandated 3 hots and a cot as their regular living situation… True story……
Love you… Dad
Homeschool Dad 
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